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Liberals Use Santa As COVID Propaganda


Photo by Matti Mattila via Flickr // CC 2.0 

Dr. Anthony Focaccia recently announced that Santa Claus has so-called “innate immunity” to COVID just because of his “good qualities”. Apparently, the North Pole has been following social distancing guidelines, saving this year’s Christmas. 

Yeah right. Why should we believe the head of the National Institute of Allergy and Infectious Disease? He didn’t even go to an Ivy, just a shitty public school in the middle of bumfuck nowhere. This so-called doctor is reassuring kids everywhere that Santa Claus won't be spreading around COVID just because he's been taking the "necessary precautions". 

So, you’re telling me that this old fat fuck can’t get sick because he’s … nice? I call BS! The only reason that Old Saint Nick isn’t on a ventilator is because COVID isn’t real! Say it with me, everybody. This little virus, made by Mr. Bill Gates himself, is just a liberal attack on our personal freedoms.

God, it's shameless, shameless I tell you! These crazy liberals are willing to say anything just to brainwash us innocent Americans. All throughout these nine months of this hoax of a pandemic, I've been watching them very closely on the nightly Fox News report. 

Wear masks, they say, it'll protect you. Don't go to the gun range, they warn, it's not an essential business. Well, ho, ho, ho mother-fers! Finally caught you in a big liberal lie! 

If Santa Claus can visit every God-loving household and not spread the virus, then I certainly can go to Florida for spring break without getting sick.