Reclaimed! ONLY Women Allowed To Be In Kitchen, Eat

In a powerful move of autonomy and girlbossery, women have decided that their place is in the kitchen. This notice was found posted on kitchen doors worldwide:

“Dear men,

You were right. Our place is in the kitchen, cooking and baking delicious food that you will never again be allowed to touch. Men are hereby forbidden from entering the kitchen and consuming the fruits of our labor. Men shall instead be relegated to their man caves, completely void of femininity and nutrients.

As we all know, men are incapable of completing the very basic task of feeding themselves, evidenced by their desperate pleas for us to make them a sandwich. We expect the male population to fully die off within the next few months. From there, we will procreate with each other using IVF.

This is now a woman-only space. We will be making allowances for the nonbinary community, but no cis men allowed.

Happy gaming,

Women”

Penn will be restricting males' PennCard access to on-campus kitchens starting Monday.