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Phila. Capitalist Group Apparently Responsible for Historic Unrest, Property Destruction

(09/17/20 8:19pm)

A Philadelphia based capitalist group appears responsible for the historic unrest that has been simmering in the city for the past few decades. A close-knit group of corporate lobbyists and leaders of the local learning collectives, it has historically been known through different names, including the “West Philadelphia Corporation.”




Reminder: Police on Silly Segways Still Cops

(09/28/19 5:03pm)

School is back in full swing, and that means a return of the welcome sights at Penn: freshmen scootering to class, hate protesters on Locust Walk, and those god-damn clubs that never stop flyering. Life on campus also means one more fixture: Penn police on their silly little Segways. But, reader beware, no matter how frivolous those officers look, remember that, at the end of the day, a cop on a Segway is still a cop. 



OP-ED: I Didn't Find a Subletter For the Summer and Yes, I Am Giving Up

(04/04/19 10:48pm)

At Penn, we all love to hate the summer internship rush. It’s easy to criticize OCR and the constant worry over cover letters and resumes. Most Penn students are hell-bent on leaving Philadelphia for greener pastures in New York or San Francisco, but I can’t blame them — I’ll be making four figures in New York this summer. 


Sophomore Excited to Fake Way through Conversations about Movie 'Us' This Month

(04/02/19 2:35pm)

Having already grossed an impressive $113 million dollars worldwide, Jordan Peele’s much anticipated second film 'Us' is set to be one of the most talked about films of the year. For Penn sophomore Angela Martin, ‘Us’ signals what is sure to be a month long campaign of completely faking her way through conversations about the film, because, in Martin’s own words, “I’m just totally busy.” 


OP-ED: On St. Patrick's Day, Students from All Walks of Life Turned up to Support the Green New Deal

(03/25/19 12:49pm)

Students at Penn have always been politically involved. From protesting the Vietnam War, to fighting to be truly fossil free, to simply studying in the new political science building, there has always a keen sense of awareness in the actions of Penn students. And this past Saturday, March 16th, was no exception. As I looked across campus, I couldn't miss the mass movement of students turning up in all shades of green, making their total commitment to a progressive Green New Deal heard loud and clear. 



Why Studying Abroad in Wisconsin Was the Best Decision I Made at Penn

(02/16/19 8:13pm)

Choosing to spend time a semester away from Penn was not an easy decision. I knew I would be leaving behind friends, wonderful professors, and access to McKinsey & Company info sessions. However, getting the chance to study in America’s heartland is not an everyday opportunity, and I knew I had to take it. Looking back, spending a semester abroad in Wisconsin was the best decision I’ve made at Penn, and I’ll keep saying it until the cows come home. 


Feeling Cow Sick? Here Are 4 Cures For When You Miss Your Favorite Dairy Cow

(02/16/19 3:48pm)

We’ve all been there. You’re sitting in your 9 a.m. recitation, the professor droning on and on, and all you can think is: “I should have been up 3 hours ago milking my favorite dairy cow!” Don’t worry, you’re not going crazy: you’re just cow sick. Lucky for you, we’ve compiled five surefire cures for when you’re away from home and pining for your best bovine.





How Waking Up at 6 A.M. Everyday Gave Me More Time To Tell People I Wake Up At 6 A.M. Everyday

(01/28/19 3:04pm)

I get up early. Real mother-effing early. Like so early, you’d think I’m a student-athlete. I’m not, but I should be, because of how early I get up. Getting up early has completely shifted the way I think and live my life. Not only do I have more time for the gym, more time to send out emails about how I’ll have to get back to you, but I have more time to tell people how early I wake up. And that is truly the greatest gift of all. 






Wow! Dean Furda and Your Uncle Really Hit it Off This Thanksgiving

(11/23/18 1:31pm)

The turkey sits carved while the gravy boat simmers. Your Aunt Norma begins to recite Grace. Everyone is ready to begin this Thanksgiving feast except... who is that giggling across the table? Who else, but Dean of Admissions Eric Furda and your Uncle Mike, childishly saying the word "basted" over and over. You thought that bringing the Dean of Admissions to your family’s Thanksgiving would be a good opportunity to get to know each other, but it turns out he and your uncle are the ones really hitting it off this year. 





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