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Hero Cop Saves Lactose Intolerant Students in Audacious Mac N Phis Bust

(09/19/17 7:17am)

When Penn Police Officer Bob Johnson received a cheese-related noise complaint at 39th and Spruce on his police scanner on Saturday night, he knew that there was no time for backup. Even though he’d heard stories of Penn’s rampant drug culture, He hadn't expected to run in to such an extreme example of substance abuse occurring right under his nose. With a level of courage that’s usually only reserved for prime time television, Bob raided the Beta house at 12:30 am to put an end to the milk-fueled madness.


Freshman Pulls First All-Nighter, Just to Get It Over With

(09/11/17 8:05pm)

Penn’s competitive culture often forces students to oscillate between struggling to maintain Penn face and getting into heated debates over who’s more exhausted. Only two weeks in, one intrepid freshman couldn’t take the suspense of waiting until late September to get into Penn’s infamous midterm season, so he took matters into his own hands. 



WOW! This Genius is Taking a Gender Studies Class to Meet Girls!

(09/07/17 7:09pm)

People often deride Penn’s hookup culture for being toxic and degrading towards women. Nevertheless, one courageous sophomore is looking to break the mold. With more and more millennials eschewing relationships in favor of dating apps like Tinder or sending blind shots in the dark to meet their next fling, Bruce Painter (C’ 20) is embracing his place as a modern day Casanova by taking a Gender Studies class to get with girls. Incredible!


MERT Treats Freshman Who Aced Thrive at Penn

(09/03/17 6:02pm)

When Jason Hughes (C’21) was accepted to Playboy’s #1 party school of 2014, he knew he that he had a lot of expectations to live up to. The opportunities seemed endless, and after totally reinventing himself over the summer Jason was sure that he’d be at the top of the social ladder in no time. But one thing stood between him and and an incredibly lit freshman year: Thrive at Penn.



Students Hold Candlelit Vigil in Support of FroGro

(04/17/17 7:54pm)

Last night dozens of Penn students put their time where their hashtags were and stood in solidarity with the #SavePennFroGo campaign by attending a candlelight vigil within the store. Although neither the official Fresh Grocer twitter nor this fun and flirty twitter account specifically for the 40th Street Fro Gro have leveraged the hashtag to raise awareness over the supermarket’s leasing issues, one can hardly take a step on campus without feeling the grief that permeates the air over the store’s impending closing.


Forget Pi Day: This Student Knows the Dow Jones Industrial Average to Thirty-Five Decimal Points

(03/14/17 7:23pm)

Even with classes canceled due to an apocalyptic winter storm, the most dedicated students on campus are still ready to celebrate Pi Day with all of the energy of an overzealous eleventh grader. You may remember Pi Day from high school, when all your math teachers wore ugly shirts plastered with pi references or jokes on March 14th (because it's 3.14, get it?). You might not see too many professors doing that at Penn, but you'll still catch an engineering student wearing an uncomfortably teal, pi-centric shirt on any given March 14th.



Penn Increases Tuition to Fund Purchase of More Weird Sculptures

(02/22/17 10:02pm)

Last week the University Board of Trustees signed off on another 3.9 percent tuition hike for undergraduates, raising Penn’s cost of attendance by $2,610 to $68,610. Although inflation rates that high are usually only good news when you’re talking about grades, this time around Penn is promising that these increases are in the best interest of its students.


Wharton Hosts Dance Marathon to Raise Awareness for Goldman Sachs

(02/16/17 12:44am)

Not wanting to be outdone by Temple’s 12 hour dance for charity or by Penn State's famous THON event, Wharton held its first annual “Goldman Sachs Awareness Dance Marathon” this week to help raise awareness for investment banking jobs at Goldman Sachs. When questioned on what inspired them to host this inaugural event, Wharton administration said “we feared that Penn students weren’t getting exposed to the magic and wonder of bulge bracket banking, and wanted to do something to change that.” The reward, final round interviews for the current recruiting cycle for the most dedicated dancers, drew great turnout from the student body.





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