Below are your search results. You can also try a Basic Search.
In an email sent to all Wharton undergrads Monday morning, Dean Geoffrey Garrett highlighted an exciting new opportunity available. The text read:
Are you ready for the most important part of your [INSERT CLASS YEAR HERE] yet? Class Board is happy to announce the newest tradition as a part of our [CLASS YEAR] experience. Come on over to [FAR AWAY LOCATION] at [A TIME WHEN EVERYONE HAS MEETINGS] to be with all your friends from [CLASS YEAR]. Oh yeah, there will be food. We will be giving out [BAD PRIZE], and one lucky winner will get [INSERT CURRENT STATUS ITEM HERE]. We cannot wait to see all of you there! Did we mention we have food?
In a developing story, Under The Button staffers have discovered not a single person in the Penn Bubble knows what FMC stands for. As a result, Provost Wendell Pritchett has decided to officially rename the building, but he needs your help to decide. Here are the front runners (please note that the building must be renamed to one of these and write-ins are not allowed):
Oh wow, would you look at that. Looks like Big Max has night mode for Microsoft Excel turned on. Seems like Ole Maxy forgot to come back to the land of the living after pulling an all-nighter working on his valuation of Toys R Us.
America, you deserve a raise. People from all political walks of life have decried the $7.50 an hour minimum wage. Finally, some concrete evidence has come to support an increase.
What is the worst part of spring break? Clearly it's the long layover in some dopey-ass North Carolina airport, because you were too cheap to get the direct flight to Puerto Rico. However, one political science student took full advantage of this extra time to get a leg up on studying for his upcoming midterm.
Want your child to get all the fame and preferential treatment that comes along with being in a select group of children of wealthy donors? Too bad, you chose to major in philosophy. However, Under the Button’s legal scholars have determined that there is no rule against naming your child Steinberg-Dietrich. None at all. It’s the wild West out here.
What the hell guys? I thought we had something here. Are you telling me that not a single person made it to page 52 of my long-form satire from last week? I put a lot of effort into these articles and you don’t even have the audacity to click the link.
Everyone please give a big welcome to the newest addition to the Kimye clan, New College House! NCH West will join America’s favorite family as the fourth son to Kanye West and Kim Kardashian.
As a citizen and a student, I am fed up with the University not recognizing Presidents Day. As a campus, we need to do a better job at honoring all of our past presidents. We need to think of those relegated to the margins of history, because, sure, Martin Van Buren might have had his birthday back in December, but that's no excuse for me not to skip my 9 a.m. on Monday.
Tensions were running at an all-time high when College sophomore Suzie Reyes chose not to do the readings for her LGST 100 class.
No Super Bowl? No problem. Meet the innovative students who plan to straight up skip classes on Wednesday.
Rejoice! Our long electronic nightmare is over. After years of anticipation, University officials were proud to announce that When2meet would be taking over the redesign process of Penn InTouch.
Fossil Free Penn has a new target in its sights: Santa.
In a press release today, Smirnoff announced it would be making a larger serving size of its popular drink, the Ice.
Yes Mom, these bruises on my neck are from when I fell down the stairs of my apartment building. Sure I live on the 23rd floor, but the elevators are slow, so you know I'm all over those stairs.
After being aggressively told to register to vote by Penn Dems, College freshman Patrick Moody had developed very strong political leanings. For months he had been training for the match up of his life, the inevitable debate with his drunk Uncle Jerry at Thanksgiving.
Wharton prides itself in its innovative culture. Many of its storied alumni have gone on to become industry titans and corporate giants. Wharton seniors Jadran Seong and Emily Lycus hope to join the famed ranks with their new startup “Toys Were We.” UTB sat down with them for an exclusive interview.
Wharton sophomore Augustin Latimer always wanted a small campus vibe. But Penn's US News Ranking was far too shiny for him to actually consider what he wanted in a college. Although the lights of Philadelphia were too bright for him, Latimer has adapted and carved out his own little campus: The 300-foot area between Steinberg-Dietrich and Jon M. Huntsman Hall.
In a desperate attempt to distract from the dismal health rating of Penn Dining, University officials announced this morning that the Class of 1920 Commons Dining Hall would be replacing all ceramic plates with Zoo-Pals. Zoo-Pals, the beloved paper plates that double as friends, pair perfectly with the sophisticated, sometimes-good cuisine served up at Commons.