Is this Big Pharma using its massive Popeye arms to wrestle the country into shelling out more money?
It didn't have anything to do with the fact that I had a hard time finding an internship the summer before.
You definitely have friends. Good, close friends. You eat meals with them, you study with them, you watch movies with them, and you even drink with them — except on your birthday.
I enjoy how batshit scared all of you are of the cold — of a crispy, red leaf gently falling onto your Barbour coat.
My body is a “temple[sic] of the Holy Spirit” (1 Corinthians 6:19-20). It hurts to say it, but Ben’s penis won’t be defiling my temple anymore.
Oh wow, so Miguel is gonna be playing at Fling. That’s awesome..right? Is it good or not good?
I mean, these cojones? Inflamed? No way in hell, broseph.
You’ve been busy with exams and clubs the past week and haven’t seen him in six days. It’s entirely possible that he hasn’t had a sufficient meal in that span of time.
Do I have mumps ? What the hell, man, course not.
Wanna know the worst part? This creep only contacts me through email.
Why are we encouraging these men to run for a position that they will never be able to do successfully?
Ah, Locust Walk. The highway of University City. Traffic can be a nightmare, but luckily, you’re from the city that never sleeps. Here are some tips for making it to DRL in a breeze while never letting anyone near you forget your heritage.
That's right, a full 15 minutes after the hour-long meeting began, Katie burst through the door apologizing for her tardiness. She didn't give an excuse, but her banana whip with chocolate chunks and cookie crumbles shows no signs of melting.
Don’t get me wrong. You seem super dope with your high-top converse and all, but this isn’t working out.
haha i mean well yea my mental health isnt [100 emoji] at the moment u know
As I looked across campus, I couldn't miss the mass movement of students turning up in all shades of green, making their total commitment to a progressive Green New Deal heard loud and clear.
Dr. Blum is a real doctor, a surgeon. He doesn’t do cosmetic procedures.
I’m simply not qualified to get any of the jobs where I can shit all over the poor and not even know I’m doing it.
I know you were really stressed out about that calculus class when we last spoke a few months ago. I hope it’s going better! You are so smart.
Ever since me and my 500 roommates moved in, everyone has been so welcoming.