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Claire Kercheval-Roig


Articles

Inspiring! Woman Predicts Stimulus Check by Overspending $1200 Last Month

“Yeah, now that I think about it, this global pandemic has actually worked out really well for me.” 


OFFICIAL SPRING 2020 GREEKRANK RANKINGS FLOORS OF VAN PELT (OFFICIAL)

Let’s be honest, this is how it is. This is probably going to be downvoted by the 4th floor but everyone knows they’re social climbers.


Man Playing Devil's Advocate Unaware He Is Devil

“I just feel like we should be listening to ALL worldviews, even the underworld views. Let’s not judge a book by its cover, or a demon by his scales, as I always say.”


Imposter Alert! Junior Who Can’t Spell 'Restaurant' Regularly Eats in Them

Okay, I’ll be honest — I’m an imposter. Despite regularly eating in restauraunts I am incapable of spelling the word ‘restraunt.’ That spelling just now was an honest try, and I must admit it brings me great shame.


Report: HSOC Major up to Pack of Cigs a Week

When asked to explain why she smokes cigarettes despite concentrating in Public Health, Jameson was quick to explain it was only to keep from hitting her Juul.


“Hey Slut! Want A Free IUD?” Penn Medicine Pilots New Targeted Ads

We had a meeting and asked ourselves: what demographic cohort would be most likely to want a free IUD? The obvious answer was, of course, sluts.


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