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Better Understanding The Other Universities Of Pennsylvania

Old people never know what's up but come on, that's nothing new. They're always going on about how much they like Ike and, you know, Stan Musial this and Gene Krupa that and ENOUGH ALREADY. Plus there are all those times when what they're saying is complete nonsense ("Put that Frank Sinatra record on the turntable for me." Huh??). So while we can't decode everything your grandma says, we can help you out when it comes to confusing remarks she may make about our school. More times than not, they are only confusing because she's not even talking about our school.

What Your Grandma Says: "I read that Olive K. Folger Hall has lots of great places to eat!"

What School She's Really Talking About: Indiana University of Pennsylvania

How You Should Respond: "Grandma, you're talking about a food court at Indiana University of Pennsylvania. That's just one of many schools in the Pennsylvania State System of Higher Education. There are fourteen schools that fall under this banner and they all end in 'University of Pennsylvania.' The school I go to isn't any of them, though. I know, it's confusing. You all done with that pudding now? You want me to clean that up?"

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What Your Grandma Says: "Are you proud to go to the nation's oldest historically black university?"

What School She's Really Talking About: Cheyney University of Pennsylvania

How You Should Respond: "No, that's one of those state schools I was talking about a minute ago. Are you even listening to me? I'm sorry, you're right, it's an easy mistake to make."

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What Your Grandma Says: "Your zip code is 16802, right?"

What School She's Really Talking About: Penn State

How You Should Respond: "No, my school is in Philadelphia, while Penn State is in the town you're thinking of. But don't worry, this is like the one situation where you could make this kind of mistake and I would not care. It happens a lot. Right, that does explain the "Not Penn State" shirt you saw at the bookstore that time. What? No, don't buy me one. Please, please don't buy me one."

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What Your Grandma Says: "Do you have any friends in the dental school?"

What School She's Really Talking About: We have no idea.

How You Should Respond: "Sure, Grandma, I have so many friends in that real school that TOTALLY exists. Why did I just roll my eyes? Uh, that's just what young people to do to say 'I love you.' No, Grandma, stop. Stop rolling your eyes. You're going to hurt yourself"