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Five Subtle Ways to Signal That You Are Involved With Greek Life

Five Subtle Ways to Signal That You Are Involved With Greek Life

1. Tell the person that you are talking to that you have had antibodies since the first semester. They’ll know.

Ego of the Weak: Kite and Key

K&K: Ultimately, I am obsessed with hearing the sound of my own voice — in fact, when other people speak, it makes me viscerally sick. I’ve also always had a proclivity for backward walking and repressing my trauma and would be thrilled to add both to my resume. 

Good for Her! DP Commenter Says She Makes $250 An Hour From Home

Good for Her! DP Commenter Says She Makes $250 An Hour From Home

According to Saqi, the work is “so easy”, consisting mainly of “copying and pasting”, “sipping martinis”, and “going on luxury cruises across the world”. How didn’t I think of this sooner?

This Quiz Will Tell You Which Dorm You're Living In!

This Quiz Will Tell You Which Dorm You're Living In!

Let us know if we got it right!

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Jobless Senior Discovers Selling Out Is Actually Hard

 “Why did no one tell me?” she groaned.  


After Complaints Over Lack of Fun In-Person Activities, Penn Introduces Locust Walk Slip N’ Slide

“Slipping and sliding with all my new friends made me realize the tuition really was worth it,” freshman Colin Mann said.


Wharton Latino Elects Its First Ever Italian-American President

“My great grandfather was Italian, and I absolutely LOVE going to Latin BBQ every year. It’s one of my favorite Penn traditions,” stated White.


UTB Writer Not Funny Anymore After CAPS Therapy Session

Especially in these unprecedented times, CAPS is more committed than ever to creating a safe and caring environment for Penn’s diverse student body. 


Heartwarming! Ted Cruz Boiled Mexican Tap Water In Solidarity

“It means a lot to me,” says Texas native, Sammy Rodriguez (W ‘23). “You know, my family in Austin has been really struggling to stay warm and find drinkable water, so to see Senator Ted Cruz take 5 minutes out of his vacation time to boil a pot of water is truly heartwarming. I’m sure it’ll mean a lot to my family too once their power comes back on.” 


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