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Breaking the Toilet: Lactose Intolerant Jessica Orders Another Whole Milk Latte

Breaking the Toilet: Lactose Intolerant Jessica Orders Another Whole Milk Latte

We emailed Wharton sophomore Justin Verdaux about his perspective on the (fecal) matter.

Penn Med Study Finds U.S. Only 5 Hours Behind Italy

The United States is as few as five hours behind Italy, and even fewer hours behind other countries.

PSA: You Should Probably Wash Your Towel Now

PSA: You Should Probably Wash Your Towel Now

I know this is going to be hard for you to hear, but the time has come for you to take that towel and put it on the floor to be washed a month from now when you get to it. 

OP-ED: The Airpods Stay In During Sex

OP-ED: The Airpods Stay In During Sex

These are AirPods pro. They have noise-canceling capabilities, so I can pleasure you without distraction and listen to my Gary V. podcast at the same time. 

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OP-ED: I'm Hungies

YES! Let’s just smoke a cigarette. Delish! Nothing tastes better than that.


OFFICIAL SPRING 2020 GREEKRANK RANKINGS FLOORS OF VAN PELT (OFFICIAL)

Let’s be honest, this is how it is. This is probably going to be downvoted by the 4th floor but everyone knows they’re social climbers.


Students Denied From Frat-Sponsored Zoom Party

By midnight, the party was at maximum capacity and the poor west coast students, whose nights were just starting, were locked out from joining in the call.


Shit Hurts So Bad Just Want Her [Bobby’s Burger Palace] Back

The truth is that I’ve been struggling with personal heartbreak for a while. It just hurts so bad. I want her. I want Bobby’s Burger Palace back to tear apart my asshole.


Get Him! This Engineering Student Thinks JoJo's Bizarre Adventure Is Just “okay”

It’s high time we show him what happens when he messes with engineering students.


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