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Anatomy Of An All Nighter

Hi. Hello. Welcome. Thank you for choosing UTB as your procrastination destination today. We dissected an all nighter for you.

Time check: 9pm
  • Recognizing that you have a final tomorrow
  • 10 minute Reddit break
  • Understanding that you have a final tomorrow
  • 10 minute Tumblr break
  • Internalizing that you have a final tomorrow
  • 10 minute Facebook break
  • Playing with the idea of playing with the idea of starting to study
Time check: 10pm
  • Breaking down what you're gonna study and when
  • Breaking down
  • Determining how much time each skipped lecture is gonna cost you
  • Calculating how much sleep you would get if you were to fall asleep right now, or now
Time check: 11pm
  • Opening a Blackboard/Canvas tab
  • Spending 10 minutes scrolling through someone's/your own Facebook timeline
  • Calculating the lowest grade you need to convince your parents that you're doing okay
  • Rounding to the next nearest hour to start studying
  • Doing a quick stress relief exercise
Time check: whenever, honestly
  • Cracking open the dusty textbook you were so proud to get a discount on
  • Being jittery as these gifs after a ninth latté
  • Not giving up
  • Convincing yourself that you work well under pressure
  • Shotgunning readings, problem sets, practice tests, all that schtuff
Time check: the line between too early and too late
  • Like treading water, except being awake
  • Recoiling from, hissing at sunrise
  • One last skim-through
  • Scheduling a post-exam block of sleep
  • Telling yourself that you got dis