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A Finals Eve Letter

Hey friend,

Damn. Things have been kind of tough lately. The semester has felt very long, and we know that you've been doing a ton of work (or feeling the pressure of not having done a ton of work). There's also a pretty good chance that you're currently sitting in an uncomfortable chair, your eyes are strained from staring at a computer screen, and you may not have eaten a hot meal recently enough. Either that or you're hungover and not functioning, which also sucks.

But you can get through this! Although it might not always seem like it, there are many many people who believe in you and are proud of youno matter what your transcript looks like. And if you've forgotten how excellent you are, please know that regardless of what your self-deprecating internal monologue says, you are awesome. 

You are intelligent, important, capable, and worthy of respect — even if you don't feel that way right now. It's okay to be stressed about whatever you have going on, but don't forget that you're tough and can handle it. You've done it before.

And yeah, apart from finals there's a lot of horrible shit happening in the world. It can feel impossible to avoid getting down about the seemingly-endless cycle of bad news. But there is a lot of good going on too, even if it's sometimes harder to see.

Sure, we realize that it might be annoying to read a totally unsolicited, weirdly sentimental, and uncharacteristically positive letter from a stranger who writes for a satirical blog. But negativity (while fun!) can weigh a person down, and even we sometimes need a break.

So take a few deep breaths, drink a glass of water, listen to a happy song, find and consume the nearest piece of candy, text or call someone who cares about you, and get into bed if you really need it.

Regardless of your bad decisions, bad vibes, or bad luck, you do have the power to try and change whatever not-great situation you might be in, or at least manage it until things get better. 

You've got this! Good luck with everything, [insert your name here]. Please don't forget that in spite of it all, we believe in you, and think that you — YES you — are a total champion.

Much love,