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Choose Your Own Adventure: Will Brad Fuck Your Girlfriend at Fling?


Photo by Joshua Ganderson / CC BY 2.0

Holy shit. Holy fucking shit. Like, yeah, Brad’s totally flirting with your girlfriend, and he’s totally gonna bang her tonight, but holy fucking shit that ass. If God rested on the seventh day, it was so that on the eighth he could devote all of his energy to creating this tantalizingly tight tush. 

You’ve been staring at his ass for a really long time. Like, a creepily long amount of time. It’s time to stop. It’s not ok to objectify male bodies, no matter how beautiful their bums are. Like, yeah, you should definitely not slap dat ass. That’s not cool. However much you want to, it is NOT OK to even think about letting your hand come into contact with those gorgeous glutes. Right?

A: Walk over and politely compliment Brad on his ass

B: Slap those cheeks