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Quiz: Does Your Roommate Secretly Have A Cat?


Photo by Tulane Public Relations / CC 2.0, ivoxis / CC0, edited by Sam Sedor

It’s a question we’ve all faced at one point or another. Luckily, the head investigative journalism publication on campus is fully prepared to help you crack the case.

1. You find some scratches on the couch in your common room. When you point them out to your roommate, she...

a) goes on a long rant about how shitty the high rises are.

b) avoids eye contact and meows softly.

c) pretends she didn’t hear you.

d) shrugs and continues playing with her fidget spinner.

2. You come home after a party one night to the sound of soft hissing coming from your roommate’s room. When you knock on his door, does he…

a) come to the door right away and ask you if you heard some weird hissing noise too?!

b) open the door holding a mug full of warm milk?

c) ignore your knock and start playing jazz music on his Spotify?

d) open the door sheepishly while a girl hides behind him?

3. You slyly ask your roommate if she’s a dog person or a cat person. What is her response?

a) “Um obviously a dog person! What a stupid question!”

b) “I am a cat.”

c) “Why do we always have to choose? I like peanut butter and jelly.”

d) “I’m a dog person I guess, are you taking some kind of Buzzfeed quiz?”

4. You decide to investigate while your roommate is in class. When you go to snoop in his room…

a) you find that it’s immaculately clean. It even looks recently vacuumed.

b) you find a litter box, a small climbing structure, and several dead mice.

c) it’s been locked from the outside. You didn’t even know that was possible.

d) you can hardly walk inside without tripping over piles of clothes and pieces of paper.

If you chose mostly A, your roommate secretly has a cat, and he or she is trying way too hard to hide it.

If you chose mostly B, your roommate is a cat. How did you not notice?

If you chose mostly C, your roommate secretly has a cat, and he or she will continue to deny it no matter how much evidence you present.

If you chose mostly D, your roommate does not have a cat. Why would you think your roommate is hiding a cat from you? That's super weird.