Amy Gutmann Lambasts Cyberbullying in Official Unofficial Penn Squirrel Catching Club

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Photo by Seyoung Kim

In a recent university-wide email, President Amy Gutmann addressed a crucial, commonly overlooked issue on campus: the rampant cyberbullying in Penn's meme group, Official Unofficial Penn Squirrel Catching Club. Specifically, she cited the incessant cyberbullying of herself.

"There are statements about me on that page that are simply not true," Gutmann wrote in her email. "Or, if they are true, they didn't need to be brought to light in meme format. Come on guys. We as a community are better than this."

Most Penn students, however, didn't see the big deal. "As the president of an institution of higher learning, Amy Gutmann ought to be used to a high level of scrutiny and criticism," said Michael Jimenez (W '18). 

"Yeah, drag and expose her," agreed a random student passing by on Locust.

Gutmann's email decried the "targeted attacks on an individual's character" and insisted, "I really, truly, am trying to seem like I care about what you care about. And I'm pretty nice, right?" In parting, Gutmann left us with these strong words: "Melania wouldn't want this."

The email immediately became the most popular copypasta in OUPSCC's history.

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