Rule Change: Quiet Hours Don’t Apply if You Have Good Taste in Music
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October 5, 2017 at 8:14 pm
In the past week Penn has seen a slight policy change regarding its quiet hours. The times that quiet hours are in effect have not changed, unless you have good taste in music. If you fall within this category, you have full privileges to blare your tunes from dusk to dawn.
Everyone appreciates good music... no matter the time. Plus, you have gotten a lot of compliments on your tunes in the past.
That one girl on your hall said she liked your music taste once, so why wouldn’t she want to hear it blaring at 2 in the morning when she is studying for her stat midterm? Everyone loves Robin Thicke, right?
Even better. If you are slick on the saxophone, let everyone know you’re a regular Lisa Simpson. Maybe serenade that girl down the hall? What was her name again? Julie. Julie loves Robin Thicke. Play that one song on the sax.
Now that you’ve got a good thing going with Robin Thicke, really seal the deal with Julie by checking out related artists on Spotify. Musiq Soulchild seems pretty cool. Play him really loud the next morning with your door cracked a tasteful 45 degrees (so it doesn’t seem like you’re trying too hard). Seem like you’re chilling. She’ll probably come in and ask whom you’re listening to. "Oh, this? It's Musiq Soulchild, of course."
Now that you and Julie are dating, it is strongly encouraged that you play music past typical quiet hours. No one wants to hear your weird sex with Julie.