Wow, Celebrities Came to Penn! Here’s Where They Pooped
Photo by Seth Fein
October 25, 2017 at 3:40 am
It’s always a treat to have celebrities visit — or even better, attend — our very attractive and popular institution. Every time a Penn alum is in the news, it's cause to lose your fucking shit. And because we were so interested in where celebrities lived, here's the logical follow-up, spilling the beans on where these celebrities pooped on campus.
John Legend: Irvine Auditorium. As a student, Legend frequented the piano in Irvine Auditorium for more than just creating music. Rumor has it, it’s the key to his rich, beautiful sound.
Benjamin Franklin: Ben on a Bench. Someone had to start the tradition, right?
Joe Biden: The floor of Perry World House, just to show how much he doesn’t care about any of you.
Nicolas Cage: Penn Museum. Who knows what he was doing around ancient artifacts?
Elon Musk: Hovering over Baltimore Avenue as a test for Tesla vehicles' new Shit Sensing™ technology.
God: The sixth floor of Van Pelt, because where else would He go?
Amy Gutmann: No data. Every time nature calls, Amy takes a private jet to an exclusive New York City restroom.