Wow! This Cool and Alternative Student Thinks There Are Too Many Starbucks On Campus

While many students relish the easy access to caffeine on campus, College sophomore Nick Alms takes an unprecedented stance. “There are too many Starbucks shops on campus,” Alms said boldly. “It came to me in a dream—this thought. While everyone else is out there following the herd, mobile ordering their Caramel Macchiatos, I’ll be out here alone, in search of something better.”

Alms explained that he was exposed to ‘real’ coffee while abroad. “When I was in London, I learned the true art of the coffee bean. It’s just not something that’s understood here. There’s a specific word used to describe it, but I’m not sure how you would say it in America. Some things get lost in translation,” Alms contended.

Alms clarified that his passion for originality stems far beyond the realm of coffee roasting. “It’s crazy to be such a free-thinker,” Alms said, shuffling his New Balance-clad feet. “Sometimes I feel isolated knowing that no one else sees the world in the deeply nuanced way that I do.”

Don’t let his alternative stance fool you, however—Alms is no hipster. “I don’t really want to define myself in such simple terms. My identity is nebulous and cannot be confined,” he explained, gazing off into the distance through his round, wire-framed glasses. “The universe is infinite; why would I waste time being like anyone else?”