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Meet the Tens of Students Who Are Secretly Excited for The All-American Rejects


Photo by Steve Watkins / CC BY-SA 2.0

The 2018 Fling lineup has already become infamous for not at all reflecting student preferences, but is it as unpopular as everyone thinks? UTB went deep to investigate, administering a campus-wide survey to assess the feelings of the student body regarding the booking of The All-American Rejects. The results were unequivocal: over twenty students, all of whom wish to remain anonymous, are excited to see The All-American Rejects. So why are people making it seem that no one is excited for the show?

It might have something to do with the fact that the student body is made up of over 10,000 undergraduates; however, these twenty-plus anonymous students are here, and they demand representation.

“The All-American Rejects wrote bangers, and that’s my big, proud truth,” said one anonymous sophomore. “To clarify, you’re not including my name in this article, right?”

Another proud freshman declared that “there are enough AAR fans at this school to fill a Claudia Cohen classroom, but no one is paying them any attention. I think it’s because no one is willing to speak out about their excitement because their friends will make fun of them.” 

When asked if any of these AAR fans planned on attending the concert, the answer was a unanimous “no.”

“Are you kidding?” asked one freshman with a poster of Chad Kroeger on their wall. “I have an image to protect.”