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Professor Looks Away And Walks Briskly After Making Eye Contact With Student


Photo by whoismargot / CC0

Paul Wegman (C '20) could be considered a teacher’s pet if he were in third grade. The star student is at the top of his class, consistently reaching the highest grades on every assignment and exam. He loves raising his hand, and never hesitates to correct any speaker. Wegman also hangs around office hours, pestering his professors with difficult, irrelevant questions. But college classes have a rather different environment; rapid-fire question mode isn’t conducive to lecturers finishing their presentations in a timely manner or providing one-on-one advice. 

Professor Mark Lowell, who teaches Wegman's chemistry class, was not prepared for this teaching position.

“I mean, it kind of blows that we have to teach to do our research,” Lowell explains. “The only reason I took this position was to go somewhere I could work in a lab, and because the director of the program was pretty hot. I really wish these fucking students would leave me alone, because I honestly can’t answer half their questions."

That’s why while walking on Walnut Streetlast week, Professor Lowell was petrified when he spotted Wegman coming the opposite way. As soon as he got close enough, Lowell pretended to be suddenly interested in the curvature and soft eggshell white color of the fence beside him, while quickly increasing his pace to avoid confrontation.

“Hey, Prof. Lowell!” Wegman shouted. But before he said anything else, Lowell quickly responded, “My wife’s dying, I need to go," without so much as meeting his student's eyes.

Clearly having avoided an unpleasant experience, Lowell smirked and confidently walked away, while Wegman was left speechless. Little did Lowell know, Wegman’s head just filled with questions, and he would have no trouble finding Lowell during office hours and emptying his mind.