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Wharton Installs Free Tampon Dispensers in Steinberg-Dietrich Hall to Make Up for Accepting 6 Women Into Class of 2022


Photo from Pxhere / CC0

Wow! What a win for feminism: The Wharton School now has free tampon dispensers in Steinberg-Dietrich Hall! Although only six women were accepted into the Wharton class of 2022, this ensures that those six women can diversify executive boards across the country, all while menstruating! This is truly a revolution for future generations of Wharton women!

Although menstruating students have previously had to stay home during that time of the month, The Wharton School is making strides in improving accessibility for those who have the unborn souls of potential human lives congealing into a bloody carcass in their underwear. Tampon dispensers have been around for generations, but now they are contained in stainless steel, sleek casing that is sure to make periods more efficient than ever before. 

We spoke to the dean of The Wharton School, Geoffrey Garrett, to get his take on this huge technological evolution, on par with the evolution of the uterus itself. He spoke a little bit about his decision to add this feature to the Steinberg-Dietrich bathrooms.

“We’ve accepted women into The Wharton School since 2015, so I figured it was high time we have free tampon dispensers in 50% of our two on-campus buildings! We wanted to reflect what our greatest alumni, President Donald Trump, thinks about menstruating women: when 'blood is coming out of her whatever,' we’d rather not know about it.” Now that is a progressive stance!

When asked if free tampon dispensers would be coming to Huntsman Hall, an anonymous source said there were fiscal constraints preventing the installation of the dispensers, adding that “it's fine if women bleed to death out of their wherever in Huntsman— as long as they don’t stain the carpets.”

We are so happy about this addition to Wharton’s student support networks: maybe seven women can join the Class of 2022!