Penn Sleep Center Study Confirms: Your Boy is Legit Passed the Fuck Out and You Should Totally Draw a Monster Dong on His Face

In a landmark study, researchers at the Penn Sleep Center have confirmed that your buddy is for sure knocked out right now. 

In addition, the study found that you should indeed whip out a Sharpie and draw a ginormous, veiny wiener on his forehead.

The study, published in Nature, found that your pal is so crunk he would not notice the pressure of a marker on his face. Accordingly, you should scrawl a thick crank on that ugly mug of his. 

In the footnotes of the paper, the authors suggested future research into whether you should take a Snapchat and send it to the rest of the squad.