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Voting Along Party Lines, Student Selects 'D' for Every Answer on Econ Midterm


Illustration by Sophie Trotto / Under the Button

Media murmurs on Monday hypothesized a split-ticket choice, or even abstention. But on Tuesday, College sophomore Danny Bowers has reportedly held the party line, answering ‘D’ for every question on his economics midterm. 

Bowers had reportedly been pushing off his decision for weeks, despite pressure from friends and family that this would be the most important midterm, like, ever. Bowers, according to a source with knowledge of the subject, showed no sign of knowing what he going to do at all.

“Monday he was in Fisher just staring blankly at a textbook-- he seemed paralyzed by the gravity of what was at stake," said a source close to Bowers. "But today he rallied, and walked in with a look that he knew exactly what he was going to do.” 

Bowers said on exiting Towne “I’m just hoping a lot more people made the choice I made today. Because if not, the curve is really going to fuck me over.”