OP-ED: I Don’t Mind Getting 25% Off This Assignment, My 8th Trip to Spicy Memory This Semester is More Important

College isn’t about the homework, it’s about the experience. For some, that experience involves community service or starting a campus organization. For others, that experience means going to a BYO at spicy memory for the eighth time instead of turning in your math assignment that’s due at midnight. 

You know that material anyways! You’ve seen every single lecture! On your laptop. In one sitting. At four times the regular speed. 

Besides, 25% off isn’t even that much. That’s like what, a third? You’ll be fine. Midterms are worth 50% of the overall grade anyways, so all you have to do is sober up by the next one so you don’t sleep through it like you did through the first two. 

So go, young child. Go to spicy memory for the eighth time. You might not remember your professor’s name, but that’s okay. At Penn, the only memories that matter are spicy.