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Choose Your Own Adventure: Will Brad Fuck Your Girlfriend at Fling?

OPINION | Josh Campbell Tuesday, March 19, 2019Tue, Mar 19, 2019

“Yooo, Braddy boy,” you begin, the Four Loko not helping you speak coherently. “How about you give my girl Jessie and I some directions to Apple Theta Pi?”

Brad chuckles. “I would, but you two don’t need ‘em — you’re already here!” 

You frown. The streets dead silent, and there isn’t a single speaker playing “Old Town Road." There couldn’t possibly be a frat party going on anywhere near here. “Oh?” you say. “Where’s the entrance then?”

“Right through that basement door,” says Brad, pointing at rusty set of bulkhead doors. “Everyone’s down there having a good time.” This proposal seems slightly sus to you, but then again, it’s probably just the Four Loko that’s making you paranoid. 

A: Go through the basement doors

B: Grab Jessica and make a run for it