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Insane Willpower: Guy Walks Past DRL Hallway Mirrors Without Stopping to Check Himself Out


Photo by Annie Luo / The Daily Pennsylvanian

They said it couldn’t be done.

It is a universal truth that a Penn student walking past the DRL hallway mirrors wouldn't be able to resist stopping and giving themselves a thorough ocular pat-down.

This morning, Matthew Willis (C ‘22) challenged this cosmic commandment. Witnesses gasped and cowered in fear as Willis, unflinching, passed the wall-mounted mirrors and successfully countered the overpowering urge to turn his head and check out that good-looking son-of-a-gun.

“I couldn’t believe my eyes,” said College junior Jose Fish, shaking his head. “I’ve been competing in triathlons since I was 13 and, try as I might, I still can’t resist holding up finger guns at that handsome bastard in the mirror.”

UTB reached out to the modern-day Hercules himself for comment.

“I started out by practicing with one of those hand mirrors, and from there I worked my way up to the bathroom mirror,” Willis recalled. “It took months, but it looks like my hard work finally paid off.”

But even for Willis, it seems that all glory is fleeting. After the interview, he admitted to sneaking a quick peek at his hair-do as he passed by the mirrors.

“Hey, that doesn’t count! ” Willis protested. “What if I had walked into that 8 A.M. math recitation and, God forbid, somebody saw me with messy hair or a cowlick? I would never, ever live that one down, that’s for sure.”