Sad: Perry the Platypus Kicked Out of His World House
Photo (with edits) by Jashley Bido / The Daily Pennsylvanian
February 18, 2020 at 12:00 am
It's been a sad day for everyone's favorite secret agent platypus. Reports indicate that Perry the Platypus (also commonly referred to as Agent P), has been evicted from the World House that bears his name.
Perry designed and constructed his World House in 2016 in an attempt to find a living space on campus better than his Harnwell suite. Unfortunately, it was soon overtaken by political science students mistakenly believing that it was an academic building, instead of Perry's private property. Now to add insult to injury, these same students have kicked Perry out of his own World House to make room for more guest speakers and perhaps a bigger TV.
"This is fucking bullshit," remarked Perry as he scoured Airbnb to find a new home. "I built this entire establishment with my own bill and beavertail. Do these fuckers even know who I AM? My name is Agent Fucking P, and you'll be hearing from me in court."
In contrast, other onlookers seemed thrilled with the development. German exchange student Heinz Doofenshmirtz even noted, "Perry has started to get really cocky recently, and it's nice for the university to put him in his place. Now I'm just worried he'll try to crash in my offices at Doofenshmirtz Evil Incorpora- I mean Harrison. Yeah. Yeah, I live in Harrison..."
We wish the best for Perry as he struggles to find a new home. At the very least, he can study abroad and join his best pals Phineas and Ferb on their myriad international adventures - whether that be building a rocket, fighting a mummy, or climbing up the Eiffel tower.