Weingarten to Provide Disability Accommodations for Students With Restless Leg Syndrome

After recent complaints from undergraduates about communication problems with Penn’s Weingarten Learning Resource Center and Disabilities Services, the center has announced that they will finally be providing testing accommodations for students with Restless Leg Syndrome. 

“Yeah, this is what they wanted, right?” said Weingarten director Katherine Callahan, while playing a game on her phone. “Yeah...testing accommodations…restless leg syndrome...holy shit the new mario kart app is so fun...uh...what were we talking about? Yeah, restless leg syndrome, those guys can have whatever they want, just leave me alone. Fuck, I got 2nd place because of you.”

“This isn’t what we asked for at all,” says Jameson Runton (C’23). “As a student with ADHD, I’ve struggled to take notes and focus on tests my whole life. I submitted the form to Penn to ask for accommodations, and even got a note from my psychiatrist, but they emailed me back an e-card with a picture of a cat that said ‘get well soon’.”

Unfortunately, Weingarten also announced that they will be withdrawing accommodations for all other disabilities. “We’re overbooked.” said Callahan, now playing Mario Kart on two phones, “I’m so busy. Soooooooo busy. And honestly, just because people feel like they need an ‘equal opportunity for education’ doesn’t mean I can provide it. There’s no way that’s in my job description. What about my needs? I didn’t want to end up in this job. I don’t know how I got here.”