Search Results
Below are your search results. You can also try a Basic Search.
(01/21/15 2:19am)
We don't know about you, but our outgoing editor-in-chief and wash-up Ben Lerner is feeling twenty-two. And since UTB is a totally unbiased news source, we figured we'd celebrate Ben's birthday by sharing this gem that we conveniently just spotted in the Street office. We've had some iconic moments with our favorite pop culture elitist leading the blog (check this out, sorority hopefuls), but if Ben has taught us anything, it's that you leave Brittany [sic] alone.
(12/12/14 7:56pm)
What better way to escape reading days (and reality) than by randomly choosing a selected stack in VP and mining for its gems? While you tried to cram an
entire semester of Math 104 into an afternoon, we took a leisurely stroll down
the R 644 S15 N3 – RA 1025 L43 A3 stack. We hope you've gotten through our last reading list, but in case you haven't, we've listed call numbers so that you can join us on this journey through great literature.
(12/09/14 5:34pm)
Amy Gutmann's Holiday Party Tonight – Lace up your running shoes, Quakers, because we're Chasing Amy and we've got her cornered at her presidential mansion. Our favorite blonde bombshell is hosting the soirée of the year tonight: her holiday party. So strut down to the White House 3812 Walnut in your finest attire and flash your Penn Card at the high-profile bouncer, because we are ready to turn up in the name of Amy.
(12/05/14 10:51pm)
Sometimes, our finance-loving friends just make it too easy. This devilishly shiny Mercedes was spotted in front of Huntsman Hall, reminding us that all of that time spent in GSRs was totally just out of passion for Accounting, and that money played absolutely no role in any Wharton student's career choice.
(11/23/14 11:14pm)
Welcome back to our newly-resurrected VP Gems feature, in
which we give the
Hoodie Allen lyric “Take you to Van Pelt/You become Van
Wilder” some real meaning.
(11/15/14 9:28pm)
Though Penn students may be the best when it comes to partying and feeling insecure, we're not so great at getting those precious hours of REM sleep. That's where PennSleeps, a Facebook page that shares articles about the importance of our beauty rest, comes in.
(11/12/14 5:14am)
In a dorm where each room needs 10,000 simultaneously blowing fans in order to be livable during the summer, the forever AC-less Hillites are keeping cool this blazing hot November by stripping down. All of it. That means the black panties too, because they absorb the most sunlight. This brick oven of a college house isn't the most architecturally sexy building on campus, but as this photo shows, that doesn't mean its lawn can't get a little naughty.
(11/02/14 10:02pm)
After Kate Taylor cancelled her visit to Penn in September, we needed some arbitrary journalism to fill the void. In a very shocking and intensely risqué TIME article, Jeffrey M. Rothbard C'72 discusses that while "recreational drugs made cheesesteaks taste better," he doesn't understand why Penn was named Playboy's top party school. In other words, he has published the literal same thing that everyone has been saying for the past month and a half, with an unexpected highlight about that one time he got wasted and woke up to two women in his bed. Basically, Jeffrey Rothbard really wants everyone to know he went to Penn and it was a solid time, and that he definitely had sex once.
(11/01/14 8:01pm)
Daylight Savings Ends Sunday – Turn your clocks back, because we get an extra hour of sleep tonight (well technically, starting Sunday at 2 a.m.)! It's the perfect excuse to take your Halloweekend debauchery up a notch, because you have a whole extra hour to work on your Monday homework. This is sure to make a world of difference – if you listen close enough, you may actually be able to hear your GPA skyrocket as you awake from your peaceful slumber tomorrow morning.
(10/28/14 8:54pm)
Professor Kenneth Goldsmith-- he's just like us!
(10/20/14 5:17pm)
Now that the excitement of the new semester is long gone and you’ve
settled into your regular routine of eating Wawa chicken tenders as a
legitimate meal, the time has finally arrived. Tomorrow, Penn wants us to pretend that we can
actually function like studious, mature adults who take care of themselves and engage in healthy relationships.
(10/03/14 7:28pm)
Time to accept that you stress-ate too much Insomnia before midterms...oops? You owe it to your skinny jeans to torch those cals, so why not get down at a four-hour dance extravaganza?
(10/01/14 5:49pm)
Free espresso outside the Writers House -- Because what goes together better than caffeine, literature, and giving free things to English majors? Okay, the Writers House isn't actually associated with this illy issimo giveaway, but we like their choice of location, nonetheless. If you need a boost before your afternoon midterm, use the remainder of your quickly-dwindling energy to sprint across the 38th Street Bridge for a free cappuccino. Just don't tell your friends from your Marketing recitation -- you don't want them to set the curve with this welcomed jolt of caffeine.
(09/25/14 7:53pm)
If you're growing tired of cockroaches and hairballs, you're in luck. The Four Seasons Hotel's food truck is currently rolling through Philly on its national tour, just in case you ever feasted on their room service and thought, "Wow, I'd really love to eat a Cheesesteak Spring Roll on my way to DRL." This food truck is intended to garner publicity, and what better way to get the name out than to sell seven-dollar Roast Pork & Broccoli Rabe to college students who voluntarily drink warm PBR?
(09/22/14 7:44pm)
This weekend, a student in Ware just couldn’t hold it in and
was fined for peeing on the Benjamin Franklin statue, confirming that sickening feeling we get whenever visitors put their children on Ben's lap for a picture. We already know that some freshmen never learn, but shouldn’t this rogue urinator have been forewarned? Luckily, the $50 fine isn't as bad as the punishment you might expect for committing the ultimate act of Penn blasphemy. That’s only one Grant or five Hamiltons to make your
mark on our favorite founding father. Next time, we suggest bringing a friend along—we
just love the thought of paying a Benjamin for Benjamin.