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(05/13/14 2:17am)
Have one last paper and STILL don't know how to procrastinate? Why not spend your time watching the long-anticipated remake of a really old and played out viral video! Luckily, Penn is really dope at remaking old viral videos. Who needs to study for that final final when you can soberly watch a bunch of facebook acquainances you know you've made eye contact with like twice but mutually never acknowledge make out? It's like watching an NSO party, but it's sort of almost art. Trust us, everything is better filmed in black and white.
(04/30/14 3:17pm)
Hey Day isn't just about blacking out/weeping uncontrollably at the thought of moving back in with your parents in a year. For some lucky men and women, it's the perfect opportunity to show how much better they are than everyone else—by being awarded intricately carved pieces of wood. Who needs a LinkedIn profile when you have a literally massive bowl to carry around? Look at how enamored everyone is; it's a WASP fairytale.
(04/26/14 7:24pm)
Spotted RIGHT NOW at Penn Relays is Bill Cosby, favorite Philly native, starting the Philly public school 4x400 meter race. While we are a fan of his other outfits, we love the gray Penn sweatsuit. Despite the benefit of seeing such a (potentially senile) icon in person, the recent influx of beautiful runners on campus has only reminded us that we should never have quit JV track. No matter how many times we go to Pottruck, we'll never look as fit as those athletes--nor as suave as Bill.
(04/22/14 6:11pm)
While Penn could not stand to be socially irrelevant, they seem to have no problem disrespecting our privacy. This past weekend, Quad residents received an email regarding "exterior roof repairs". If by chance you weren't comfortable with random workers climbing around your windows, Penn had a solution. For those with "privacy concerns regarding this work", just "feel free to close your blinds during the scheduled work period." Aka, shut up and stop being a baby. Problem solved! Penn don't care about your personal space and let's be honest, your roommate is probably creepier.
(04/15/14 5:03pm)
For the second year in a row, Penn Law's website has been nominated for a Webby, the "Internet's highest honor" (which is a real life thing). A Webby is apparently the "leading international award honoring excellence on the Internet" and not what we imagine fans of Charlotte's Web call themselves. Last year, Penn Law won the People’s Voice Webby Award in the Law category so basically they are killing it. Even we have to admit, the site it pretty. Look at the colors, the scrolling columns, and the tabs- so many tabs! No wonder why they are the ONLY law school nominated in the Law Category. Penn Law, keep doing you, and if you want to support, vote here.
(04/02/14 7:59pm)
No, jk. It’s actually a barren, hellish landscape that makes us sad whenever we walk by. Like seriously, this is ugly. It doesn't even have a name yet! Don’t worry though, it probably only cost us like $1 billion and a few sketchy admits. We're rolling in it after making history, and all this money is going into a pit? It's still probably nicer than Hill, and for that we are thankful.
(03/26/14 6:11pm)
While our New Year's resolution to "work out" eventually succumbed to our laziness, it's good to see others are still motivated. Over at Pottruck, this Penn Zumba instructor recently Facebook tagged all of her students to let them she wasn't coming to class because of her roadside "expulsion of food". Though the details may be bit, uh gross, we cannot help but love the sense of Penn Zumba community. What else might they be up to together? Zumba BYOs followed by hilarious drunk texting in their GroupMe? Penn Zumba formals? We'll stick to guessing since we ain't walking all the way to Pottruck to find out.
(03/18/14 7:51pm)
DP March Madness Bracket--Submit your bracket for the DP March Madness contest by Thursday at noon for a chance to win "eternal bragging rights" and some seriously dope prizes to Copa ($100 for first, $75 for second, $50 for third). Now that's a lot of ca$h to drop at Copa drunch.
(03/06/14 2:03am)
IT'S OK TO DOUBLE DIP -- While Penn students love finding solutions to previously solved problems, Double Count at Penn may actually make your life easier. The site helps you easily find courses (with codes!) that double count for requirements for Fall 2014. So procrastinate for midterms with mock scheduling (as if you weren't already) – double dipping never tasted so good.
(02/27/14 8:22pm)
Let's be honest, before we were being betchy on CollegiateACB, we were all over College Confidential. The majority of our junior year was spent researching how scary West Philly is, how un-prestigous and ugly Penn is, or diagnosing our inferiority complex. But the best part about College Confidential was "chancing," a verb we admittedly just made up. We spent hours stalking admitted students and seeing if we fit the mold of a perf Penn kid. It was grueling work. Luckily for Westchester/Greenwich moms everywhere, the process just got streamlined!
(02/20/14 7:24pm)
Sadly, not everyone at Penn can enjoy Valentine's Day surrounded by the people they love and cherish. While we spent our day having it all and NOT horribly alone, clearly some members of the Penn community had it rough. Maybe this lovebird should have followed our advice and splurged on some thing more meaningful than a nondescript bear-dog. Meanwhile, the discarded frozen pizza serves as a perfect compliment to this lover's trashed Valentine's Day dreams. Clearly not every DFMO ends happily ever after.