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Look, being an adult is hard. We get it. But one freshman recently took it to the next level, leaving her laundry out for so long that it started to get just a li'l moldy. Why yes, in addition to the bread in Commons being less than edible from time to time, apparently laundry in the college houses can grow mildew.
Election Day Is Today -- For those of you living under a rock: today is Election Day! Get out there and (fucking) vote! Make your voice heard! Take a stand! Exercise your right as an American citizen! Just don't post a picture of yourself wearing an "I Voted Today" sticker because we've seen enough of those on our newsfeeds already!
Last week, a professor brought her pet lizard to class, and all we can say is...wow, profs – they're just like us! They love domesticated animals, too!!!
Double double, toil and trouble. Halloween is here, and UTB is ready to stir the cauldron. Last year, we brought eternal glory to some and inescapable shame to others, and we're thirsty for more.
Well, well, well--Hallo-Homecoming weekend is upon us already! We don't know what scarier: that it's almost November, that we have a midterm the Monday after Halloween, or that we'll most likely find ourselves dressed up as a "sexy" cat, complete with a generic crop top and high-waisted leggings from American Apparel. In the meantime, follow along as we break down all the spooky 'n kooky festivities going on this week.
Well, well, well--Hallo-Homecoming weekend is upon us already! We don't know what scarier: that it's almost November, that we have a midterm the Monday after Halloween, or that we'll most likely find ourselves dressed up as a "sexy" cat, complete with a generic crop top and high-waisted leggings from American Apparel. In the meantime, follow along as we break down all the spooky 'n kooky festivities going on this week.
Well, well, well--Hallo-Homecoming weekend is upon us already! We don't know what scarier: that it's almost November, that we have a midterm the Monday after Halloween, or that we'll most likely find ourselves dressed up as a "sexy" cat, complete with a generic crop top and high-waisted leggings from American Apparel. In the meantime, follow along as we break down all the spooky 'n kooky festivities going on this week.
And they're going hard. Seriously, after years of being called the worst dorm on campus, Hill is taking the matter into its own hands. We came across this eloquently punny graffiti last night, and instead of being offended, our respect for the building that everyone loves to hate has only gone up. After all, you can just feel the raw emotion that went into this.
Welcome back ladies and gents, to the only school that doesn't recognize Columbus Day! Aren't you glad you went Ivy? Anyway, we could claim to not know what you did this Fall Break, but we're pretty sure we have you figured out. But hey, don't take our word for it: Complete our quiz and find out for yourself!
Um, it must be our birthday, because the news that Jeremih is coming to campus makes us want to have SEX. Lots of it. Bless you, SPEC-TRUM, for bringing the man who so inspiringly taught us birthdays aren't about the candles or cake to the Rotunda on October 23rd. You all are stars.
Oh snap, it's the first full week of October! Midterm season is winding down (or just revving up, for those of you tortured souls who have exams after Fall Break), and our calendars are seeking to avenge those date nights spent in Huntsman. So, grab your PSL and get ready to Insta the shit out of all the autumnal activities going down this week.
FBG$. That's certainly the mantra a young Warren Buffett, seen here cheering at a football game circa 1948, seems to be promoting. Like damn, what a badass. That fur stole, those sleek frames, his smug expression, and the fact that he couldn't care less that there's a foxy lady next to him...it all screams unapologetic baller. Alas, as we enter a new month that brings with it midterm hell and unwelcome fall weather, we urge you all to channel your inner Warren. Because Warren, whatever you've got ($64 billion), we want it (okay, we'd be willing to go halfsies).
For anyone proud of their V -- No, not that one. We mean vegetarianism, duh! In honor of World Vegetarian Day, select vegetarian appetizers will be on the house at participating Dave Magrogran restaurants, like Doc Magrogan's (in case the name connection wasn't obvious), Harvest (LOL), and Stella Rossa Ristorante (fancy!) tomorrow from 11 a.m. to 4 p.m. "Can't wait for the free hummus at Harvest!"...we say as we chow down on our Bobby's burger.
Here at Penn, we're used to having compassionate professors. Eccentric ones, too. And an unjustifiably cruel one here and there. But Professor Danielle Bassett just took it up a notch, as she was awarded a MacArthur fellowship for her work in physics.
Here at Penn, we're used to having compassionate professors. Eccentric ones, too. And an unjustifiably cruel one here and there. But Professor Danielle Bassett just took it up a notch, as she was awarded a MacArthur fellowship for her work in physics.
Happy Hump Day, Quakers! Need a little something to set the mood for the most sensual day of the week? Take the above as our offering--because nothing screams sexy more than a creepy critter crawling around Commons. WARNING: When paired with this, arousal levels are sure to skyrocket. You're welcome.
Oh, and that we do. According to a recent "study" conducted by the leading researchers over at GrubHub, Penn tops the list of most caffeinated universities, as more than 10% of our orders include coffee, espresso, or energy drinks.
Wake up Quakers, it's July! Your summer is halfway over--can you believe it? No? Just check that Google Calendar that you haven't opened since your last final. Go ahead, let yourself gasp in denial, shock, and utter horror.
And we are feelin' it! Following the recent and historic legalization of gay marriage in the state of Pennsylvania, two Penn alumnae decided to put a ring on it. On the steps of College Hall this past Saturday, Drew Tye, C'09, surprised girlfriend Lex Ruby Howe, C'07, with a proposal. And, UTB is elated to report, Lex said yes! We wish you two nothing but the best in your enGAYgment (Editor's Note: EIC Ben Lerner must receive a pun copyright for coining this term) and life together!
Hey, we get it: graduation ceremonies are long! And tiring! And it can get really stuffy underneath that (impressively-decorated) cap and gown! However, Chrissy Teigen, John Legend's wife and therefore Amy G's biggest competition, took it to the next level at Monday's Commencement ceremony.