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Alas, there is a Wharton alum God looking out for us: Ashton Kutcher will, in fact, be making an appearance at Penn! After crushing our hearts this past week by canceling his lecture, Ashton is now back in our good graces, as he's rescheduled his visit for Monday, October 7th.
Quakers, we invite you to take a moment of silence to honor the fact that on this day, exactly 29 years ago, former President Gerald R. Ford was temporarily trapped in an elevator in Van Pelt. Alas, we urge you to celebrate this occasion with both solemnity and respect. We can only hope that this time next year, on its 30th anniversary, Gerald Ford Trapped In An Elevator Day is granted the national recognition that it deserves. Update: Aww, they're celebrating at VP:
Ah, Penn: if there's one axiom we live by, it's work hard, play harder. And as this recent article about Ivy League cocktails proves, we certainly get inebriated in a cla$$y way. "The Pennsylvanian" features Calvados brandy, Madeira wine, an egg white (best be careful of the calories), and a lemon twist. Branded as the "Colonia-era frat shooter," we're not sure that Ben Franklin would be too happy to learn what constitutes such a drink today.
As if the news that Ashton Kutcher cancelled on us didn't make this Tuesday bad enough already, we were then forced to deal with the above. Here to promote Terror Behind The Walls, the Eastern State Penitentiary's annual haunted house, this ghostly convict has been spotted creeping around 34th Street. We weren't so much scared by his presence as we were disappointed that it wasn't Ashton himself hiding behind that mask.
Welcome to OCR! Not a fan? Perhaps Nielsen's promotion for the company's newest app, TOPTEN, will make you a bit more eager for life post-Penn.
In case our roundup of the latest UCity food news left you wanting more, then we've got you covered. Irish-American pub, St. Declan's Well, recently opened at 31st and Walnut Streets, and with its extensive beer menu and bar food staples, it's sure to satisfy.
You know the deal: it's the Friday before Halloweekend, and the line you're forced to wait in at American Apparel for that neon orange fanny pack is nearing Pottruck. You would go to Urban, but they don't carry nearly enough spandex to satisfy the needs of you and your sorority betches. Frustrated, you come to the upsetting realization that, although Penn's campus may be well-stocked in the food department, it's really lacking in the clothing department.
Amateur Instagrammers everywhere, take note. Philadelphia-based photographer Nathaniel Dodson's time-lapse video entitled "Philly Is Ugly" proves that the 215 is anything but. His work, which features images of our beloved city from Love Park to the Art Museum, and everywhere in between (even the Penn softball field makes the cut), puts X Pro II and Amaro to shame. Let's face it: Not even your #nofilter grams can compete with these shots. Good thing you'll be back in the bubble City of Brotherly Love in only a matter of days.
Wawa's baaack -- And just in time for fall semester. Your most consistent and legitimate source of love and affection at Penn has gotten a makeover, and is unveiling it this Thursday, August 15th at 10 a.m. University officials are expected to attend the reopening ceremony of the Wawa by the Quad, proving that it's still the place to be seen.
It's 11:57 p.m.: you've got three minutes until your writing seminar portfolio is due. As you upload your work to Blackboard, you just can't help yourself. However, just as you're deleting your notes about justificatory reasoning, panic sets in - Blackboard has crashed.
Ah, college. A time for independence. A time for experimentation. And apparently, a time to "hook up without the emotional entanglement of a relationship."
Although the Baltimore Avenue Dollar stroll was unfortunately rescheduled due to rain, we've got another food-centric event to let you guys in on. And it's a lot like Restaurant Week, which we know you can't get enough of.
Quakers, we are saddened to announce the temporary closing of yet another Penn favorite come this July: Lolita, a BYO located on 13th Street, in the heart of Midtown Village.
Baltimore Ave Dollar Stroll is back -- This Thursday night, local eateries are offering items for just $1 on Baltimore Avenue from 42nd to 50th Streets. Check out all the deetz, including a list of participants, here. What better way to welcome summer than with friends and nearly free food?
Chipotle and Honest Tom's, make room, there's a new Mexican eatery in town. Local chef Vanessa Jerolmack is set to open Taco Angeleno at 50th and Baltimore this July. The take-out style restaurant will feature picnic tables and - drum roll, please - a food truck.
For all you Quakers still on campus, some exciting news: best-selling author David Sedaris is slated to make an appearance at the Penn Bookstore TOMORROW to promote his new book, Let's Explore Diabetes With Owls. Sedaris' latest work is a collection of essays that discuss his childhood, his hometown, health, partner and politics. You may know some of them already if you follow his often-hilarious musings. So head on over to the Penn Bookstore next week and do something intellectual (book not screen!) for a change.
While even a casual run-in with Amy on Locust can make us swoon, recent Facebook pics and statuses reporting A-Gutt sightings in Hong Kong have got us green with envy. Starstruck Penn students have been bumping into our dear old Prez abroad, and we want to know what color suit she was wearing why. According to this Penn News article, Amy G traveled to Asia earlier this month to host an alumni event aimed at improving relationships between the University and its international graduates. She also announced plans to open a Penn Wharton China Center in Beijing to connect local entrepreneurs and Penn alumni. So basically, Wharton does run the world. However, Madame Prez's trip does stir the pot a little, given the controversial comments regarding China that Joe Biden made at Penn's commencement ceremony. In fact, a group of Chinese grads were so outraged that they drafted a petition to get Biden to apologize for his remarks. Despite the tension that may accompany A-Gutt's trip, we wish her nothing but safe travels. We bet she even wears an eye mask when she sleeps on planes. She's classy like that.
Hey Quakers, UTB here. Think we packed up and left with the rest of you for an impressive internship in New York or a backpacking trip through the Swiss Alps? Ha, think again. Our only plans include keeping you updated all summer long.
Alas, we've hit that crucial point during finals: some people are done and others still have exams on Monday and Tuesday. Good thing there's light at the end of the tunnel. Here's a list of the five best ways to procrastinate in these last few days of darkness:
We know that maintaining such ~impressive~ grades is expensive: late-night espresso shots to get you through that Huntsman all-nighter really add up. Alas, Penn Bookstore to the rescue! Just give 'em your "Best Piece of Advice" and you could win a $50 gift card as part of the Time to Shine Sweepstakes. What kind of advice are they looking for? And what exactly is the Time to Shine Sweepstakes? We have no idea. But there's money involved, so who really cares.