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Zaynab Sanogo


Articles

No, Seriously. Why Is Every TA Hot?

My sources tell me that I need to contact the professor if I’m interested in becoming a teaching assistant, but as a pretty person, I’ve never been one to have to ask for what I want.


Five Subtle Ways to Signal That You Are Involved With Greek Life

1. Tell the person that you are talking to that you have had antibodies since the first semester. They’ll know.


Disappointing: Mask and Wig Still Not Funny

Have you heard their jokes? How have these guys achieved international stardom? 


Breaking: University to Begin Offering B.A. in Astrology

This announcement comes on the heels of the entire world’s impending spiritual transformation under a global pandemic.


Alex Trebek: "What is Eternal Oblivion?"

For Alex, we decided to create a custom Jeopardy game centered around the one question we all have: what happens after we die? 



Breaking: Men Still Not Funny

Their millennia of social and political domination has provided them with everything except a sense of humor.  


Op-Ed: Nicki Minaj Deserves A Pulitzer Prize

The fact that Bob Dylan has a Pulitzer Prize and Nicki Minaj does not is utterly reprehensible.


How to Tell Your White Friends That They Will Spend the Rest of Eternity Burning in Hell

The idea of piety is fundamentally at odds with the cultural habits of white people. The idea of salvation is, quite frankly, laughable. 


It's Literally 50% Likely to Happen: You Can't Keep Naming Divorce as Your Childhood Trauma

Maybe your mom lost that signature twinkle in her eye, and your dad simply couldn’t bear to look at her anymore.


Um, I'm Confused: What's So Funny About 69ing?

The jokes are a simple acknowledgment of the number, simply followed by the word, “Nice.” 


Tips for Perfect Mental Health: Don't Go to Therapy

Therapy is a capitalist cash-grab scheme, and we’re tired of big Psych compelling our readers to waste their money.


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