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Choose Your Own Adventure: Will You Fuck Jeff From Writing Sem?

Photo (with edits) by Minsuh Park / The Daily Pennsylvanian

Following at a safe distance, you spot Jeff ducking into College Hall. Not letting him escape your sight, you pursue Jeff through a hidden door and discover a secret basement. It’s dim, and you can barely see yourself place one foot in front of the other. Only the echoes of Jeff’s steps tell you that you’re going in the right direction. Gradually, as you keep walking, gentle candlelight flickers on the walls. Jeff heads through a cavernous passageway, and close behind, you peek through it from behind a corner. Inside is a large atrium, illuminated by thousands of flickering candles.

You suddenly gasp. Standing in the middle of an arcane rune is none other than Amy Gutmann! “Have you brought them?” she asks Jeff as he approaches. 

“Of course,” says Jeff, pointing in your direction, and he grins as he makes eye contact with you. You duck back behind the door way, an icy hand clutching your heart. What do you do?

  1. Ask Amy G. to take a selfie with you
  2. Run away and pretend none of this happened