Quiz: Is She Ghosting You, or Is She in the Monk Class?
September 15, 2019 at 12:29 pm
We've all been there – you met a special new lassie and think everything's going great, but she suddenly seems to have dropped off the face of the Earth. Take this quiz to find out if she's rejecting you with an emotionally devoid tourniquet of silence or if she's actually into you but foregoing technological and verbal communication in the pursuit of deliberate living with her classmates in the monk class.
She sees you doing homework outside Perry World House and you wave her over to hang out. She sits down, but...
A) She's texting the whole time, which is weird and kind of insulting because she has her read receipts on and you know that she knows that you know that she hasn't read the message you sent her two days ago.
B) She listens attentively to what you say and writes replies on a piece of paper, but every 15-30 minutes, she stops to record what she is doing in her journal.
You're up for a morning run at 5:45 A.M. and see her trudging down Locust. What is she up to?
A) The person she's been hooking up with is walking her home, and they're both in their clothes from last night. (Count this question double if they are sharing a bagel)
B) She's on her way to meet up with a group of friends who all get up at 5:30 every day and go to sleep at 10 every night. They're going to the graveyard by 40th Street Portal to find a gravestone with red Japanese writing on it.
You invite her to a BBQ darty.
A) She Facebook messages you "srry im a vegetarian :/" and doesn't reply when you say you can grab some of those gud Morning Star veggie patties.
B) She shows up but won't talk to you or anyone else and brings a live rabbit which she slaughters, skins, and grills. She then eats the rabbit without any of your pre-packaged buns or cheese slices.
You text her asking if she wants to get coffee from 10-11 A,M. on Monday, Wednesday, or Friday. How does she reply?
A) She heart reacts your message, but, when you ask if Saxby's is the spot, she doesn't reply.
B) She never reads your message, but a carrier pigeon delivers a handwritten note saying that she can only do Tuesdays and Thursdays because she has to go to RELS 356 - Living Deliberately: Monks, Saints, and the Contemplative Life.
If you answered mostly As: Sorry, pal! It seems like she's just not that into you.
If you answered mostly Bs: Score!! She's probably just in the Monk Class. Don't get too excited though — physical intimacy is forbidden by McDaniels himself, and she won't speak to you until December. Try again next semester if she's still even remotely similar to the girl you were once into.