International Student Brands Himself as Gift to the City

Percy von Guinness (W '23), related to both the founder of the beer and the book, is a gift to the Philadelphia area. “I am looking to raise the visibility of Philadelphia as a city,” said Guinness to his international vlog channel, blowing a puff of a sexy Parliament cigarette.

Following Percy’s graduation at Penn, the city will appear on google maps as “The Place Percy von Guinness Went to School.” 

We are excited about Guinness' contribution to the school…to the school community, I mean. Like, the overall vibe. You know, unrelated to tuition or donations,” said Penn’s Dean of Admissions. “We hope to make Guinness the official beer of Philadelphia and the official beer of Penn’s campus. We will consider taking St. Patrick’s day off and hope that the legacy of Guinness continues long after Guinness’ monumental graduation.”