British Student Only Refers to Jimmy John’s as ‘James Jonathan’s’

Citing his “proper upbringing,” Wharton sophomore and known British person Rupert Algernon Sinclair IV has confirmed that he refers to local fast-food chain Jimmy John’s solely as “James Jonathan’s.” 

Sinclair apparently believed that “James Jonathan’s” was the real name of the sandwich shop and that Jimmy John’s was simply “another of your preposterous American colloquialisms.” 

“There’s no sense of decorum in this country,” said Sinclair, Britishly. “When I was at Eton, such informality would have earned one six lashes and limited crumpet privileges for two weeks.”

At publishing time, Sinclair reportedly asked fellow British student Basil Harrington if he would be up for “a spot of supper at The Tea Dome.”