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Anti Vaxxers Weigh In: Let’s Throw Measles Back Into the Mix!


Photo by Becky Molinoff / The Daily Pennsylvanian

Okay y’all, this has been fun. I feel good about the way this has been going. We finally stopped overmedicating the population, and look at the results! Everything is going swimmingly. We anti-vaxxers always knew that it would take a pandemic that doesn’t have a vaccine for the world to realize that vaccines are not only unnecessary but are actually a government ploy to control the population.

But look. I think we can do even better. Why would we stop at one wildly dangerous, devastating illness when we could do more? Sure, there’s no vaccine for coronavirus yet, so it’s a little different from those other great pandemics. But there’s plenty of diseases that do have vaccines. Why wouldn’t we bring some of those back too?

We can’t give those pro-vaxxers the opportunity to claim that this coronavirus thing was just a fluke, a one-of-a-kind situation where a vaccine was totally not necessary and everything went super well without one. We need to make it totally clear that vaccines are never the answer. And how better to do that than to throw some other pandemics of the past back into the mix.

I would like to think at this point we can all agree that vaccines are useless and everyone is better off without them; we don’t have a vaccine for COVID-19, and the world has legit never been better. So I don’t see how anyone could really continue to argue at this point that vaccines do any good. But we shouldn’t count on people to be rational - we have to make totally sure that everyone sees how pointless vaccines are.

Now I want to be clear, I’m not saying that it has to be measles. I’d be just as happy if we brought back another dangerous disease that the population has uselessly chased away with a vaccine. Mumps, for example. Or maybe polio! There are honestly so many diseases that the human population got through despite the destructive nature of dumb vaccines. Let's come together and rid the world of vaccines once and for all!