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Astronautical Engineering and Ten Other Things That Are Easier Than Meal Prepping for One


In in the age of the coronavirus pandemic, many of our favorite restaurants and dining halls have been closed, forcing us to cook our own meals. The entire process of choosing meals, going to ACME, and then actually preparing and cooking them is spiritually and emotionally draining. It’s so difficult, in fact, that we’ve compiled a list of things that are easier than meal-prepping for one. 

  1. Astronautical Engineering. We don’t actually know what this is, we just looked up “hardest things” and this came up. But we know for a fact that it’s easier than figuring out your week’s worth of eats. 
  2. Childbirth. Now that we’re thinking about it, having twins is probably on par with meal prepping’s level of difficulty. But just one kid? Definitely easier. 
  3. Self-checkout at ACME without setting off seven different alarms. God forbid you actually go grocery shopping with the delusion that you can buy food for one — there’s no way you’re getting out of there without an ACME employee’s assistance. 
  4. Glassblowing. Surprisingly easy in comparison to the ordeal of nourishing yourself.
  5. Watching "Normal People" with your parents. When you started it, you thought it would be fine. And then about 20 minutes later, it was like, “oh...okay... so there is a lot of sex in this.” 
  6. Being happy at the University of Pennsylvania. And that’s saying something. Because this is clinically impossible! 
  7. Grieving. A parent? A child? A goldfish? All easier.
  8. Trying to grab something that you dropped behind the fridge except your hand is too fat to reach under there and fish it out and none of the stuff you have is long enough to fish it out so you kinda just stare at it. Self-explanatory. 
  9. The Saturday Crossword. Also self-explanatory.

10. Licking your elbow. This is actually harder than meal-prepping. But I bet you tried, idiot. 

On the bright side, students who meal prep for one supposedly get priority treatment at CAPS. Rightfully so.