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Op-Ed: Stop Bringing Your Kids to Clark Park, I Need to Smoke


Photo by electrobrainpdx / CC BY-NC-SA 2.0

Smokers listen up! Clark Park is under attack.

The other day I was chilling in Clark Park, sipping my iced coffee, reading my Ben Lerner, smoking my cig, like a hot bitch. The sun was out, there was a little breeze going on, everything in my life was perfect in that very moment. Suddenly I spotted something disturbing: strollers. Men and women who were presumably parents pushing around small humans, presumably their progeny, in strollers. Many strollers. Strollers with various children coming in different directions. Coming at me. Coming fast. I killed the light immediately and fled the scene.

Clark Park was no longer a safe space for us. Smokers are being oppressed

All this can change. Parents: start from yourselves. Each and every one of you, please stop bringing your kids to Clark Park. Free Clark Park. Free smokers. Bring justice to us future lung cancer patients.