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BREAKING: People Who Are Trying to Fuck Get Trapped in Elevator


Photo from Pixabay / CC by 2.0

In an unprecedented turn of events this Friday night, Sarah (C’25) and Michael (W’24) were stuck in the Harnwell elevator for close to 5 hours. After meeting at the SAE house, the two decided to continue the rest of their evening in private. What happened next shocked them both. “I mean I wasn’t even planning on learning her name y’know,” says Michael, “I thought we would just hook up and then see each other on Tinder for the next few years, maybe run into each other at Commons. I’m not really sure what to say.” 

After the two realized they were stuck, Sarah elected to dig deeper to pass the time. “I mean we were both sobering up and I could tell that we’d be in the elevator for a while. He really started to open up to me, he even cried when he told me how he tore his ACL in high school.” After undergoing more than most couples do in a lifetime, the two have decided to pursue a relationship. Michael told us that the two are in love, saying that “[he’s] never spent this much time just getting to know a girl. [Sarah] has all these interests man, it’s like where do I even start?” 

There is no doubt that we all are rooting for this underdog love story. After their treacherous night in the elevator, there is truly no obstacle that their love cannot over come.