Under The Groupon: Free Stuff For Finals
December 8, 2011 at 9:04 am
[Disclaimer: Papyrus is such a joke. So is this post.] Finals are coming up soon! This sucks, we know. But you know what doesn't suck? Getting free stuff! Luckily for you, we've teamed up with some of Penn's favorite campus institutions to get you more of what you want. It's like Groupon, but for stuff you actually want to use– like not kankle removal or cupcake decorating classes. You're welcome in advance.
New Style Pizzeria You buy: 2 large pizzas (any toppings) You get: One bulletproof vest.
Chipotle You buy: 3 burritos (guacamole not included) You get: One roll of toilet paper and a clean linen-scented aerosol air freshener
Natural Shoe Store You buy: Any pair of shoes of a value equal to or greater than $70 You get: Wait, the Natural Shoe Store exists?FroGro You buy: 49 hams You get: $2 off your 50th ham!!!!!!!
Penn Book Center You buy: Anything You get: Angry looks from the cashier
CVS You buy: The item of the month You get: "Gummy" "bears"
Sweetgreen You buy: Any seasonal salad You get: What's wrong with you? You just spent $10 on leaves and oil. Look at your life. Look at your choices.
Blockley Pourhouse You buy: 10 mixed drinks with tequila You get: Heeeeyeyyyyyy guyss free roundh of drinkz forr every11 on meee lolololololol