Locust Flaikus

Come all ye loyal classmates now, in hall and campus through,

Lift out your hands for flyers, for royal UTB flaikus!

Fair Charitable Laughter has her coupons, 

Old Planned Parenthood her condoms too,

But for dear clubs on locust waaaaaaaaaaaaaalk, 

let's write some damn haikus!

Ready for Hillary

Clinton dynasty, 

A-Gutt's blonde bombshell homegirl, 

My body's ready

Planned Parenthood — Voter Registration

Registered to vote, 

Now registered in two states, 

I hope that's legal

Charitable Laughter Show at the Iron Gate Theater

Go laugh your ass off, 

Suicide prevention is, 

What they're hoping for*

*proceeds benefit American Foundation for Suicide Prevention

Penn Football Home Opener vs Villanova

Let's play some football, 

We rule — Villanova drools, 

Freshmen  learn the cheers

"Free 'Psychedelic' Jesus Books and Tapes"...?

Are they religious? 

Who's even handing these out? 

So many questions...

Support Penn Fund

Couldn't get flyer, 

Because "I'm not a senior," 

I guess still donate...  :'(

Josh Matthews Music

Rando on locust, 

Handed me some download card, 

You do you, Matthews