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Penn Researchers Unable to Determine Why the Rhythm Room Exists

Photo by Arman Murphy Credit: Arman Murphy

Penn students have long been confused by the existence of the Rhythm Room, the bar inside the Cinemark located on 40th and Walnut. In fact, everyone, whether or not they're a Penn student, is confused when they go to the movie theater and remember that there is, for whatever reason, a bar inside of it.

Last fall, a multidisciplinary team of Penn researchers received a grant to investigate, among other things, why exactly the Rhythm Room exists. They could not figure out why.

The teams' other investigations proved similarly fruitless. The world-class academics failed to determine why any Cinemark employee thought it was a good idea to put a bar inside the theater (one of several questionable decisions made by the establishment's management), or why anyone anywhere would ever put a bar inside of a movie theater. 

The researchers could only come to one definitive conclusion: no Penn student has ever actually  set foot inside the Rhythm Room. This, of course, raises another question: how is it still in business?

For now, the student body's questions about the mysterious bar remain unanswered, and it remains campus' second-most enigmatic establishment after, of course, Avril 50.