Professor Submits Final Grades Late, Now HE Loses Half a Letter Grade

Well, well, well, would you look at that: it’s syllabus policy revenge time. Professor Thornton has yet to submit his students’ final grades to Penn InTouch, but the deadline was last Thursday. And if we look at page two of his syllabus, paragraph three, line five, it clearly states that “Late assignments will result in a penalty of half a letter grade per day outstanding submission.” So ha ha—  see how it feels! Good luck with your GPA now! 

…What’s that? So, it’s not really possible for him to lose half a letter grade because he doesn’t actually have grades or a GPA at all? Hmm. Ok, that’s fine. BUT! What if he gave back half a letter grade to all of us for every day the grades aren’t submitted? Yes! Victory is ours! 

….Oh, so that’s too far from the policy for people to understand the correlation and that can’t happen either? I see, I see. And I’m guessing losing half of his yearly salary for each da- 

…Right absolutely not I would never suggest something that extreme or inappropriate. Fine Professor Thornton, I guess you win for now. Oh. And, um, I hope no hurt feelings from all of this. Thank you for a truly inspiring and captivating semester. I’m really looking forward to receiving my final grade and hopefully you will keep me in mind for any potential research opportunities.