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After Two Months of College My Body Consists of Primordial Soup


Anna O'Neill-Dietel/Smithsonian Institution/only gfx

After subsisting off Grommen's caprese sandwiches and six hours of sleep for the past eight weeks, my body is reduced to primordial soup. I am just a sack full of organic compounds sloshing around. Not even a mitochondria in sight. 

Yes I am taking rigorous, enriching courses taught by the experts in their respective fields. Hell, sometimes I even do the StairMaster at Pottruck. In spite of that, I am de-evolving. Three weeks ago I was a monkey. Two weeks ago I was a triceratops. Now I am just a nutrient rich ocean. Proof? Last week when I was a mudfish I forgot to go to office hours. Then I turned in my homework late and only partially finished. Yesterday I turned in an essay in Ariel 11 pt. And I forgot to paste in works cited from citatioxmachine.net

But great things can come out of primordial soup, right? It just needs a zap of electricity to make some basic monomers. Miller-Urey I am right here.