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How to Find the Right Penn Face for Your Face Shape

(10/31/19 2:00pm)

According to Gutmann’s Law, all Penn students must sport their best Penn Face every day. But there’s a catch — you can’t wear just any Penn Face. Depending on your natural features, some Penn Faces will be more flattering on you, and it’s critical that you choose the right one.  Do you see how good everyone else looks? That’s because they’re matching their Penn Face to their face shape, and you’re not. And that’s because they have more friends than you and are more accomplished than you are. Read on to find out if you are wearing the right Penn Face for your face shape.

https://www.underthebutton.com/article/2019/10/choosing-penn-face-shape

How to Adapt Your Five-Year Plan for the Imminent Climate Crisis

(10/24/19 4:01pm)

We’ve all been there: the interviewer asks you, “Where do you see yourself in five years?” But what’s a girl to do when the planet is in imminent danger due to climate change and pollution? Make sure to let the interviewer know that why you’re a strong candidate in the likely event of ecological disaster and the collapse of society as we know it. This might sound difficult, but don’t fret—here are three nifty answers to that tricky question.

https://www.underthebutton.com/article/2019/10/five-year-plan-interview-environmental-disaster

Intense Love Affair Blossoming Between Anonymous Ferret and Anonymous Manatee in Shared Google Doc

(10/23/19 2:50pm)

The impassioned trials and tribulations of star-crossed lovers have captured our intention since Shakespearean times. In the same tradition as Romeo and Juliet, the sexual tension between two collaborators in this shared study guide is really heating up. While “Psych 101 Midterm (Definitions)” might not sound like the most romantic setting, Anonymous Ferret and Anonymous Manatee prove to the cold and cruel world around them true connections only require love, regardless of those who will doubt or disapprove.

https://www.underthebutton.com/article/2019/10/love-affair-anonymous-google-doc

Sophomore Assures Friends That He’s Cuter in Real Life

(10/18/19 5:18pm)

Last Monday, Melissa Hawkins (N '22) spent her afternoon making sure her friends knew that the guy she hooked up with over the weekend is, like, way cuter in real life. She scrolled through his Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn, and Pinterest to find a flattering, non-blurry picture of his face from the past three years to no avail. All she could find were group pictures from his middle school soccer team and blurry Photo Booth selfies with the sepia filter.

https://www.underthebutton.com/article/2019/10/sophomore-assures-cuter-in-real-life

Fraternities Defend Ratio Policy: 'We Just Want Our Parties to Pass the Bechdel Test'

(10/15/19 3:58pm)

Fraternities at the University of Pennsylvania and at colleges across the country have been widely condemned for their unofficial “ratio” policy for hopeful partygoers. Many fraternities allow only groups with a preferable ratio of women to men, which many see as evidence of a heteronormative and predatory environment. 

https://www.underthebutton.com/article/2019/10/fraternities-parties-bechdel-test

I Love Exploring Philly. Have You Been to Parc?

(10/07/19 8:07am)

Penn students are often criticized for never leaving campus. Luckily, that criticism doesn't apply to me. I go on so many adventures, even as far as a place called Rittenhouse, and I'm not talking about where you have your Geology recitations! Sometimes, if I’m in Rittenhouse and start to get hungry, I'll even be courageous and try a hole-in-the-wall restaurant, like this cute place called Parc.

https://www.underthebutton.com/article/2019/10/exploring-philadelphia-parc

Op-Ed: Do My Roommates Have Terrible Taste in Music or Do I Just Hate Them

(10/06/19 1:18pm)

Picture this: I’m sitting in my room and I hear music through the wall, coming from the shared living space in this house. I wouldn’t describe the music as pleasant. In fact, it was absolutely heinous. Usually, I’m a pretty considerate roommate. Low maintenance. Chill. But if I have to listen to this playlist for another second of my life, I’m going to fucking lose it.

https://www.underthebutton.com/article/2019/10/roommates-music-taste-hate

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