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Sure, Penn is only mentioned once at 9:07, but the whole video from Dartmouth's commencement is worth it. English thesis idea: compare/contrast Conan's grad speech with Denzel. That's how theses work, right?
Yesterday's New York Post featured a piece on the Hamptons bar Nello's, which, according to 19-year-old "Eric," is very easy on IDs. Eric, who is listed in the article as a Penn student, was "throwing back $27 shots of Patron tequila" and had come because Nello's is "the perfect place if you want to meet girls who are DTF." While this sounds like typical Penn douchebaggery, mystery surrounds this alleged Quaker.
Is it just us, or is the Huffington Post slowly killing the whole list thing? Our latest ranking accomplishment is one of the ten colleges with the fewest cars, or a "duh" moment filled with urban institutions and the University of Wisconsin at Madison. This would've been ten times more interesting if they just said "look, Wisco doesn't allow cars on campus!" since that was kind of the only interesting point.
Holy Shit, There Was (Another) Earthquake In Philly — NBC Philadelphia reports that a "mysterious boom" heard in northeast Philly was actually a 1.7 magnitude earthquake. A 1.9 magnitude quake hit nearby Mount Holly, NJ a few weeks ago.
That's what we like to see. There's also another version.
Are you fluent in the English language? Can you turn on a computer? Are you a terrorist?
WhartonBitch is the new SushiWithMyGirls is the new WhiteGirlProblems, because stereotype Twitters (is that what this trend is called?) are so in right now.
Before, if your friends thought you'd hit it off with someone, they'd drag your ass to Smoke's and make you Meep them the old-fashioned way. But now there's a new website aimed at expediting sorta-blind dates: Blindesque. Spawned from the same brain that gave you PennEats, this is, well... kind of creepy. According to the description, you can make: a profile for your friend (feel free to not tell her/him), and you will then have access to a database of other profiles, created by friends. You will only be able to see select information about each person, but if you like what you see, click the 'connect' button next to their profile. Once they accept, you both have access to last names, a headshot picture, and, of course, a message option. Only people who have verified Penn email addresses can sign up. So go ahead and try it out. Your friend will never be contacted and doesn't even necessarily know about it... So what have you both got to lose? The site has a variety of boxes you can fill in for a friend like height, eye color and celebrity lookalike, but it won't be live until enough people sign up. Do us the favor and put some stuff on there so we can see what goes down next.
Add this to Penn's headlines for the week: basketball player Zack Gordon is one of the top ten hottest college basketball players, according to obscurities of the internet TheSportsFag.com.
It was really rude of Obama to steal the spotlight from the Rosengarten flash mob dance last night at 11:00 p.m. Luckily, the crowd was good-natured enough to make it a finals-cum-patriotism celebration.
For a humbling, historic moment, Penn students sure are, well... here are some tweets.
This is way better than cow milking.
According to Philly.com, some of the Pronto-esque PLCB wine machines will start vending hard liquor. WHICH IS AWESOME. Machines around Philly will most likely feature vodka and gin, as some kind of survey discovered eastern PA likes clear drank best.
The DP today says that there's a chance chametz-haven ABP could be kicked out of Huntsman in 2012. What could possibly go in its place? What other restaurant can fuel MBAs and offer such amenities as being totally easy to steal from?
Alpha Phi, first place War of the Roses winners
Spring Fling 2011 from Alex Neier on Vimeo.
Tomorrow marks one of the holiest days of the year: 4/20, the annual celebration of all things green and weed-y. Once you've gotten your smoke on, though, you might too dazed to make a decision about where to feed your sudden appetite. Never fear, UTB is here to guide you through your hungry, sunny state of bliss. We've got some suggestions below about where to nosh on some of the most effective munchie cures. The weather's supposed to be perfect tomorrow, too, so try to get your snacks to go.
And bless them for it. They literally could not make it easier or more worthwhile to go to the (apparently major) home women's lax game against Princeton on Wednesday. They're offering:
On Wednesday, if you're not too busy tumbling or being really slutty, there's a free screening of the new movie "Bridesmaids" at the Rave from 7:30-9:30 p.m.
Stop Sending Us Stupid Shit And Actually Enter Our Contest -- If you're going to enter our Fling contest (which you can still do until Monday!), your entry has to be relevant to Fling. That's the whole point. So don't send us some random video you made for a class six months ago about trade liberalization in Latin America. Let the real creative juices flow!