Your Guide To: Super Bowl XLIII

Yeah, UTB had to bring in a ringer to clear up this whole "Super Bowl" business.  Enter certified Y-chromosome haver and Doug Funnie lookalike Ben Rosen.

So you're not an expert on football, but you want to act like one when you watch the game. No biggie. We present to you The Official UnderTheButton List of Super Bowl XLIII Fun Facts and Talking Points. Just consult it throughout the game, complain about the referees occasionally, and in no time you'll earn the respect and fear of your fellow Super Bowl watchers.

First, the basics: The Pittsburgh Steelers, who wear black and gold, are favored by a touchdown over the Arizona Cardinals, who wear red and white.

Before this season, the Cardinals had consistently been one of the worst teams in the league. The greatest moment in their franchise's history was fictional and starred Cuba Gooding Jr.

Meanwhile, the Steelers have won five Super Bowls, the most in NFL history along with the Cowboys and 49ers. They won four of them with this guy as their quarterback.

Every season Cardinals quarterback Kurt Warner has started all 16 games, his team has gone to the Super Bowl. Warner loves three things: stubble, sweet cuffs, and drawing pictures of Jesus.

Steelers quarterback Ben Roethlisberger played awful in his first Super Bowl, with a 22.6 passer rating (80 is solid). He also has a line of 97% fat free beef jerky.

Cardinals wide receiver Larry Fitzgerald has a sportswriter dad and people can't stop talking about it.

Steelers coach Mike Tomlin looks exactly like Love and Basketball's Omar Epps.

Cardinals running back Edgerrin James has complained all season about his lack of playing time. With all of his brooding, he's the closest thing this game has to a Tim Riggins.

If you're looking to make a pick for the game, we're officially calling a Cardinals upset win, 21-17, but we're usually wrong about these things. Enjoy the game!