Line Blurs Between Playing Hard to Get and Standing Alone in Apes Basement

I know that the weekend is here. And I know what your plan is:

1. Enter Apes through the back entrance
2. Grab a solo cup to increase your social capital
3. Stand in the corner for an extended period of time (either surveying the room or on phone with brightness too high)
4. Eventually, he'll spot you.
5. He'll panic because he thinks you must be either:
   1. Sweeping gaze around the room because you're patiently awaiting the arrival of your new guy
   2. On your phone, texting your new situationship because he:
      1. Doesn't go to Penn
      2. Isn't a brother
      3. Is staying in to study
6. He'll approach you from across the room realizing there isn't much time left :))))
7. The spark will finally reignite (it was extinguished after one night... six months ago)
8. You'll leave Apes hand in hand. Yes.

But no. For this upcoming weekend, the line has officially blurred: you are not playing hard to get with a guy that doesn't care about you, you're standing alone in the Apes basement. And you're not even dressed in theme.

Check yourself. It's time to rethink.