OP-ED: Action Items? Deliverables? What Happened to Hip Mobility?
You anguished for nine months over something stupid. Now you can be normal.
Penn-Specific
GBF Population Nosedives After Self-Actualized Girlypop Goes Abroad
They’re all in Spain, frolicking in Salamanca.
BREAKING: Penn to Accept Its First Ever Lower Merionite
Daniel Scanlon
Thursday, Sept. 14, 2023Thu, Sep 14, 2023
A decisive blow that’s sure to usher in new social interactions and a newfound appreciation for small, working-class communities: Penn Admissions has accepted a scrappy young fellow into the Class of 2027.
Ice Spice to Receive Honorary Doctorate From Wharton Marketing Department
Daniel Scanlon
Friday, Feb. 3, 2023Fri, Feb 3, 2023
"[She] blazed the trail for several thousand grants, fellowships, and exalted spiritual epiphanies."
Photo Essay: Is Nobody Going to Comment on My Petiteness?
The world is crumbling before my micrometer-wide eyes!
